Flirting Tips

  1. State reigns supreme. The most important component of a successful flirtation is being in the right mood for flirting. Good flirts are playful, have a sense of fun, adventure and a curiosity about people. When you feel good about yourself, only then can you give this to others. You can learn to use the skills of NLP to make changes in states whenever you need to do something childlike each day, jumping in puddles, smiling for no reason. See people not as something you have to ‘deal with’ but as a gateway to new adventures and
  2. Let go of the outcome and get it anyway If your main focus is concentrated on what you want, it will show. You may come across as desperate. Instead of worrying whether you will score or make a good impression, focus on what you can give. Ask your self how you can easily make other people feel good. It will return to you once the connection is made. Your brain grows with the repetition of actions as neurons that connect the areas of the brain creating these actions. The neurons become strengthened each time the connection is made. The activity becomes automatic. You will begin to flirt naturally and adapt your style of flirting to the situation.
  3. Be yourself. Sigmund Freud, whether you agree with him or not, had a few cool things to say. One of them was “We leak the truth from every pore.” Phoneys get discovered sooner or later. If you pretend to be that which you are not, you will very quickly find yourself with less friends, less connections and less opportunities to meet someone who is right for you. Of course, remember how important it is to show yourself in a good light.
  4. Feedback v Failure – Bobby Charlton said “if you don’t shoot you won’t score, if you do shoot, you may score, if you never shoot you will never score”. People often give up when they don’t get immediate results. Monitor what works and what doesn’t work. If you aren’t getting the results you want, ask yourself what you could do differently that would allow you to. When you believe that there is no failure in life and that whatever result you get is a learning tool, you will succeed. Learn from what doesn’t work and do something different.
  5. Monitor and become aware of the effects you have when you flirt. Some women send out signals of overt sexual flirting when all they want is to be friendly. Others send out overtly sexual signals because they want attention. And they will get it. Unfortunately, some of the attention will be unwanted. Practise with your close friends asking them to give you honest feedback. Practise in the mirror. When you begin to understand the effect of what you do, you will be in a position to make changes..
  1. The dreaded chat up lines . ‘Give us a good chat up line then’. This is the initial response from a most men when I tell them I teach flirting. Many women will have heard some of these chat-up clichés before. It won’t do you any favours guys. There is no such thing as a ready to wear line. Each ‘line’ should be a genuine sentiment of what happening at the moment. Sometimes the simplest opening gambits are the best. Sometimes by paying attention to the person you want to flirt with and noticing their good points, you will come up with a natural and successful line.
    And if you can’t think of one saying “hello” with a smile and walking on by with a glance back… is my favourite all time successful line!      Keys to successful flirting – Part 2