1. Develop Confidence Confidence is at the heart of all flirting. The rest of these flirting tips are useless without confidence. We are all born confident, but some of us lose it over the years because of things people say, experiences etc. If you lack confidence, start reading books, get yourself a confidence coach and be prepared to do some work on building up your self-love. Like that you will become a tremendously successful flirt
2. Flirting is meant to be fun. Don’t do things you don’t enjoy because you are desperate for a date or to find someone to flirt with. The only flirting goal you should have is to have fun. If you find it hard to have fun, it’s because you’re probably spending time in your head, talking bad to yourself. Start focusing on the good things in life, watch comedies, spend time with people who are funny. Having fun allows you to relax and start flirting naturally.
2. Smile This follows on naturally from having fun. A smile makes a person appear much more attractive. Just try looking in the mirror while you are frowning and then turn it into a smile! You’ll notice the difference. People respond to smiles. They are overt messages that say ‘I’m here, I feel good towards you, and I’m nice’.
3. Flirt with your eyes.
The eyes are considered the windows of your soul. Making eye contact is one of the essential keys to commencing a good flirting experience. If you find it hard to make eye contact, especially with someone you want to flirt with, try practising with strangers, preferably old people.. They love connecting and their positive response will help you develop your eye contact skills. Look once, look away and look back again to create the flirting eye contact tease. AND smile before you look. The smile shows up in your eyes. If you need to think of something that makes you laugh and then make the eye contact!
4. Make the first flirting conversation move Most girls think that men should begin the conversation, but men actually love women to make the first connection. A simple smile and eye contact will break the ice. Practise in supermarkets, by asking how the person likes a product they have in their bag. Or chat about the weather or something new in the store or the decor. It’s called small talk. Small talk is the first step to developing a flirting experience with someone.
5. Learn to take yourself seriously NOT. On our flirting weekends we used to bring in a comedian who talked about how to be amused by your disasters. He suggested that if you fall over, or drop something or look klutzy, instead of blushing and running away, you should smile, take a bow and offer a repeat performance. This lets other people laugh at you too and makes them feel warm to you. GSOH [good sense of humor] is one of the top requirements in most dating site profiles. Practise until you’re naturally able to laugh at yourself.
6. Get your colors done. Not everyone is classically beautiful, but there is one flirting tip that can help you make the most of yourself and allow your inner beauty to shine. When you wear colors that suit your skin tone and hair, you’ll have a glow about you. The right color brings out the best in you. Find a color consultant and go ‘get your colors done’. It’s amazing how much flirtatiousness you’ll feel when you look at your very best.
Make sure you dress right for the occasion and that you are clean at least. Develop your own style and don’t be a prey to fashion – like wearing short shorts because they’re fashionable when your fat thighs are not your best feature.
7. You can’t flirt sitting alone in front of your TV. The ultimate way to make the best of these flirting tips is to put yourself in situations where there are people to flirt with! We know a couple who met at a Startrek convention. The key is to follow your fascinations and find people who share interests with you. It’s much easier to start talking when you have something you both love to talk about.
Bonus Flirting Tip! Ask interesting questions. We repeat this a lot! People who appear interested in others are perceived as interesting themselves! People like talking about themselves, so ask questions that help them bring out their inner flirt. Here’s our favorite formula for flirting in conversation.
1. Ask what they do. 2. Ask ‘do you like it’. 3. If they say ‘yes’ ask ‘What do you love about it?’. If they say ‘no’ ask ‘What would you love to be doing if you could do anything in the world’. This apples to everyone even those who are unemployed.
Don’t turn it into an interrogation. When they say something that you want to comment on, wait till they finish before you chime in. This takes practise, but you can use your friends or work colleagues or online chat friends and people you don’t really want to flirt with as test subjects until you refine your questioning flirting technique.
Remember – the key to becoming a great flirt is to begin with developing your self-estee and social confidence. Do what it takes to help yourself.
You can begin by reading my book in pdf format ‘The Flirt Coach’s Secrets of Attraction’ It’s packed full of practical exercises and explorations that will help you attract the right person to you. And it’s half the price it was when it was published by Harper Collins Thorsons. Check it out here
